My Last First Kiss: When the Absurd is God’s Way

“Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh  my God!”  This phrase rapidly bombarded my thoughts, as it normally does when I’m scared, shocked, or really happy.  Once it starts there’s no stopping.  Here I am, facing my dad, in between some of my best and newly made friends, in front of 200+ family and friends, and about to kiss the man of my dreams for the very first time.  “Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God!”  This can’t be my life!

My life looked a lot different 2 1/2 years ago.  I was fed up and ready to do something so radically different, I’d be guaranteed different results. At some point different results became just as attractive as better results.  I was 27 years old, a Pastor's daughter, a graduate from thee Spelman College, and 1/3 of God’s Chosen, the gospel trio I’ve sung with since high school (click here to check out our latest cd “1&6” on iTunes <-- shameless plug), but I was searching and wanted desperately to do something about it.  I knew there was a depth in Christ I had not experienced, but something kept getting in my way.

2010 had been a huge year for me spiritually.  After the failure of a serious relationship  I found myself at an all time low.  There was no doubt I needed more of God, so I made it my year of discipline.  First, I tackled prayer and bible study.  After a few weeks my prayer schedule was on and poppin.  Next, I pursued physical strength.   I started my 30-minute exercise regimen (click here for the video) and religiously worked out at least 3 days a week.  Lastly, I desired a healthy lifestyle.  I committed to a better diet of no soda, limited sweets, and promised to eat more meatless meals.  I was on a roll!  It was now 2012, I’d come a long way, but I still longed for more.  I needed to confront my issues.  One day as I scoured the internet I came across a blog by Heather Lindsey that recounted her decision to not kiss another man until her wedding day (click here for Heather Lindsey’s webpage).  I read the blog in disbelief.  How absurd! ...it was exactly what I needed.

Please hear me out, I am not saying kissing is a sin, but for me it was a stronghold used to lure me into sexual sin.  Although I had not gone "all the way," my pattern showed that I lacked self-control.  I would go back and forth in my mind trying to determine at exactly what point were my actions dishonoring God.  The guilt I felt after going what I deemed to be "too far" would paralyze me in the presence of God.  The conviction I felt handicapped my spiritual development and, within romantic relationships, masked real issues that needed to be addressed.  I had to make a change.  Not only did I want a deeper and uninhibited relationship with the Lord but I also desired a relationship with a man who would connect with my heart as opposed to my body.
   

Our Beginning (September 2012)

I thought about it.  I prayed about it.  I thought again and prayed again.  Quite honestly it took me about 4 months to finally decide on such an absurd idea.  The decision was made easier considering I was not involved with anyone (kinda hard to kiss when there are no lips around lol), but I knew that would eventually change.  Eventually came quick, because right after informing my friends about my decision (for accountability) I met an amazing man.  His name was Bio Benibo.  I’d known him from 5th grade but hadn’t seen him since, due to he and his family moving to Texas.  On our second date, as the night came to a close and right before the perfect goodnight kiss seemed inevitable,  I told him.  I was a bag of nerves and I knew I was risking our relationship if he didn’t agree to stand by my convictions, but the only thing scarier was the risk I would've taken by crumbling under pressure and giving into temptation yet again.  Where would that lead me?  What would that say about the significant strides I’d taken since 2010?

When Bio hesitantly agreed I blogged about it (click here to read) and shared the news with the world (facebook), because I was astounded by God’s grace and wanted to inspire others to trust God as I had. I was reminded of Abraham and Sarah in Genesis 17 who were promised a son, but after years of barrenness did not believe and took matters into their own hands.  Although seemingly absurd, God did not change his promise and still opened Sarah’s womb to birth Isaac.  God did what I considered absurd and blessed me above and beyond what I imagined.

The night Bio proposed (February 2014)

This blog is not to make you feel less than holy or even out of order if you kiss.  However, it is to encourage you to seek God and ask for His leading in everything you do.  What I initially thought would cripple our relationship became a major factor to the strength of our relationship.  For the first time in my life I would be able to hang out with my boyfriend (fiance) and instantly go into prayer.  I would be able to go and minister through song without guilt preceding or following me.  My boyfriend (fiance) would be able to take me out, be a perfect gentleman, and not once would I have to question his intentions.  Then it dawned on me, this is what freedom feels like!  I finally understood the scripture, "Blessed are those who hear the Word of God and obey it.” (Luke 11:28)  Blessed is an understatement.

God’s way is always the better way.  Abraham and Sarah are witnesses.  Lot is a witness and strangely enough even Lot’s wife is a witness.  She had the opportunity to choose God’s way but rejected it in fear of losing what she left behind, which cost her her life.   What do you fear leaving behind?  Is God calling you deeper?  Has He expressed any boundaries for your life that you continue to ignore?  Pray.  Listen.  Obey.  It will all be worth it in the end.  I am a witness!

His hands cupped my face.  I lifted my hands to his arms and leaned in.  “Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh  my God!”  The. best. kiss. ever.  Thanks God.
-Sarah

My Last First Kiss (September 2014)

Annnnd another one...my wedding party was thee BEST!

Click here to see the highlight video of my wedding! 

Photography: Muyiwa of Forever Day Photos
Makeup: LyzaDora & Nettie Kelley

"Walk the Talk!"

“Walk the Talk” is a movement! 

In an effort to encourage God’s people, we present to you the “Walk the Talk” campaign.  Too often we have noticed our lifestyle as Christians contradict the very message we preach.  Our method of communicating the Gospel has become increasingly hypocritical and ineffective; being limited to lip service only.  The “Walk the Talk” campaign is one that emphasizes the importance of not just believing what we preach, but living what we preach.  No longer will we sing songs about faith and doubt God, or sing songs about holiness and fulfill the lusts of the flesh. It is time to be who God has called us to be and “Walk the Talk!”

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.” - II Corinthians 5:17 (NKJV)

Here you will find blogs, photos and inspiration that inspire us to Walk the Talk.  Read, share, and express your thoughts about how we, the body of Christ, can become more of what God has called us to be.  Not just by speaking the truth, but by living the truth. 

Check our website (gc3music.com) for updates and to purchase “Walk the Talk” merchandise!